It's three o'clock, and I JUST showered. I've been up since 5:30 with Spencer, but with all the before-school chaos, the household work, the non-negotiable spiritual study time, computer work, and the constant chattering of my two-year-old, a shower is a luxury.
I'm coming up for air for five minutes before it's time to jump into our dinner routine; I just feel the need to record the details of life "in the trenches" because someday things won't be this hectic. I won't have that overwhelming need for a break, I won't be awakened by screaming every morning, and I won't have a little baby in the bathtub with me--pouring shampoo all over the place and splashing soap bubbles in my face. But for now, my reality is made up of things like:
"Will you open this new toy I got for my birthday? Here. You can proofread the thank you notes I wrote to my friends."
"Will you PLEASE call the radio station and dedicate a song to us?"
"I forgot my homework again."
"I want some stash-ee-ohs" (pistachios).
"Can we make a smoothie?"
"I can't find my shorts" (so the basket of clean laundry gets turned upside down to look for them).
"My toe hurts."
"What do I do about this person at school who keeps copying off my papers?"
"I love you."
My family is made up of my best friends. Yes, they need me all the time, but I thrive on their questions, their ideas, their kisses, and their awesome dance moves. I think it's all right, however, to acknowledge that every hour is not blissful.
I've been burning the candle at both ends for the past few days, so I'm more tired than usual. My bedroom is harboring 30 boxes of office supplies that need to be sorted, school is getting out in one month, and I haven't volunteered in the classroom once, our closets are begging to be de-junked, and I haven't even thought about which activities my children would like to do this fall. The Power of Moms is growing like crazy, and I have a zillion ideas I want to implement there, but I am learning that I have to be patient and put first things first (Mind Organization for Moms has been a HUGE help for me in this area).
It's natural for mothers to want everything to be perfectly pulled together all the time, but even when we're totally organized, totally healthy, and totally focused, life is not going to be perfect. If you're having a rough time right now, you're not alone. Let's take a deep breath together, jump back into this incredible process of raising children, and try to do the very best we can. The work we're doing really does matter.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
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