However, I know how things go with blogs, and I don't want anyone to think that I "have it all together" or that every day works out perfectly around here. My cute friend Susan referred to me as "superwoman" the other day, and I had to cringe because I am NOT superwoman in any sense of the word, and I feel terrible if anyone gets that impression. It just means I'm not communicating clearly enough.
This morning has been absolutely awful, and I thought you might like to know that. I don't know why we like to hear about people's awful days, but here you go:
- About half of our family is feeling sick today--some weird stomach bug/headache/dizzy kind of thing. So Grace is home from school, and we didn't give each other kisses after our family prayer because we don't want to spread any germs, and we're all a little bit cranky.
- Or maybe it's just me that's cranky. As I read different blogs, I haven't noticed many women talking about hormone swings, but I think it's important to note because I'm sure I'm not the only one. As I'm getting into my 30s, I'm noticing that at specific points of each month, I start to feel like the whole world is coming down around me. I feel overwhelmed at the thought of grocery shopping, I want to cry when Spencer starts tearing the office apart, and I don't even know where to begin when I look at my "to do" list. It's quite frustrating because I'll have several great days in a row, and then all of a sudden I'm a complete mess. Eric asked me to write a letter to myself saying, "It's okay. Life is going to get better," so I actually did that last month, and I'm hoping the letter will work today :)
- All right, and now that I'm trying to list all the things that are going wrong, I'm realizing that my hormone/not feeling well-self is the main problem, and everything else will work itself out. I think I'll stop making this list and go take a little rest on the couch.
On the flip side, I don't like worrying that what I say might come across wrong, and I don't like the fact that a blog can't possibly represent an accurate portrayal of a person's life. I worry that perhaps this isn't the best use of time.
I'll keep thinking about it, but in the meantime, please know that like you, I'm doing the best I can, and like you, I'm struggling every day.
And if you have any suggestions or thoughts or ideas to share with me, I'd love to hear them.