Family Mission Statement T-Shirts...Take One

I have this dream of showing up at Family Camp this summer with matching t-shirts.  I'm still working on the style, fonts, etc., but here's my first attempt at a design--featuring our Family Mission Statement (which was totally written by our children).

It's funny because even though my children suggested this over and over again as our mission statement, I kept trying to make it more "professional."  Well, now we have a professional one all typed up somewhere, but the only one we can actually remember is THIS one!  I'm sure it will change over the years, but for now, this is our focus--spreading love within our family, to our neighbors, and to the world.  Just like butter on toast.

How the Power of Moms Retreat Made Me a New Mom

It has been such a boost these past couple of weeks to hear how the June Power of Moms Retreat has been an influence for good in the lives of our attendees.  It takes more hours than I can count to run this website/organization, and it means so much to know that all this work matters to someone out there. 

What's great is that the Retreat also made ME a new mom!  I've noticed that since I returned from St. George, I'm more patient, I'm more excited about life, I feel less alone during the hard times, and I feel such a hope for the future.  Just sitting in the same room with 30 motivated, dedicated, talented women helped me to see what's possible as I raise my children, and that vision isn't something you can buy.  

One specific skill I learned at the Retreat (which I want to write as ReTreat--because it was such a treat!) is how to look at the "sticky points" of my day and create solutions.  Some of the practical solutions I learned over the weekend are as follows:

• When I want my two-year-old to open his mouth while I brush his teeth, all I need to do is ask him to repeat a series of funny noises that necessitate him opening his mouth.  It works like a charm...no more wrestling at bedtime.
• When my children are grumpy in the car, I ask them what special treat/privilege they'd like when we get home, and I invite them to sit nicely so they can have that treat.  (It was amazing to see a whole van load of children calm down when they had a reason to do so.)
• When one of my children whines to me in the car, I ask them to start over and say, "Mother Dearest..."  (That one always makes us smile.)
• When I see a child who has clearly "had it" for the day, I give him/her a chance to calm down: "Sweetie, go take a shower, eat a snack, and rest for 30 minutes in your bed until dinnertime."  Why should I let cranky children keep getting more cranky?
• When Spencer (my two-year-old) won't obey, I make it a game.  Fun and games is the key for preschoolers, according to Linda Eyre, and she's right!  Instead of getting upset with him when he wants to run all over the store parking lot, I ask him questions like, "Can you pull that HEAVY door open?  Are you strong?"  Or if he wants to play in the van instead of coming into the house, I redirect him toward something interesting in the front yard: "Wow--what color is that leaf?"  or "Want to help me find the BIG trashcan?"  Allyson came to church with me after we returned from Saren's house, and she helped Spencer stay calm through the meeting by making funny faces at him.  It was wonderful!

Being at the ReTreat helped me to see that there are tons of solutions out there that aren't difficult to implement.  I used to get flustered when my children acted like children, but now I think, "What would make this situation better?"  

Shawni gave me a great little tip that involves writing on my children's fingers.  You just grab a pen and one of your children's hands, and you put one letter on the tip of each finger--each letter representing one thing you love about that child.  I've been asking each child to come up with two things they love about themselves, and then I add three more.  They keep trying to make the letters spell something funny, and they get SO excited whenever I do this.  Thanks for the idea, Shawni!  Here's Alia, practicing the piano with her labeled hand:

And then Grace decided that I needed letters written on my hand, as well.  So cute of her.

My life isn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination.  I've been in tears at least three times this past week as I've felt overwhelmed and exhausted with everything going on (a busy last week of school, a little boy who wakes up between 4:50 and 5:30 every morning--screaming, lots of messes, and lots of projects I want desperately to finish but can't quite manage right now), but through it all, I do feel happy. I know that everything will work out, and I know that if I keep trying, keep hanging in there, and keep taking my naps, this process of motherhood will be the best experience I can imagine.

My children are 10, 8, 7, and 2, but I am a new mom.

Mind Organization for Moms Videos

For someone who really doesn't like to make videos of herself, I think it's kind of funny that I've posted two videos in a row this week.  I would never have even started making videos if it weren't for the Mom 2.0 Summit, where I learned that videos are important if you want your new friends to get to know you through the computer screen...so here you go!

Last weekend, Saren's family came and stayed with us for a few days, and an hour before they headed back to St. George, her husband, Jared, took six children to the park so Saren and I could record this video.  We were so squished into my home office that there wasn't room for Saren to sit behind the computer (which is why I'm looking up during the whole thing--she was leaning against my husband's desk).

So many people have asked if they could see how I implemented Mind Organization for Moms into my own life, and I figured this would also be a good way to better explain the system to potential M.O.M. participants.  David Allen has put together such an incredible system, and I am determined to share it with all the moms out there who are feeling as stressed out as I was.

One fun side note is that the desk I'm sitting at in this video was my Mother's Day present from my husband.  I only had a little card table before this, so he did some research on Craig's List and found this awesome desk for $20.  He drove out to the seller's home to buy it, carted it back to our house (and all the way up the stairs), and got it completely set up for me while I was out running errands.  To me, that spells ROMANCE!

Another reason I'm so excited about the desk is because it shows that you can get totally organized for less than $100...including your supplies, furniture, and the Mind Organization for Moms program.

I've got some great edits to M.O.M. "in the works" right now, and I'm trying to get them up online before my children get out of school for summer break, but these late nights are killing me, so I promised myself I'd be in bed by midnight tonight.

The program is still being offered for $30 (until September 1st), and we're also offering it free until that date to anyone who shares our site with 30 moms.  Click HERE for details.  My goal is to get 1,000 moms using the program by August 31st, so if you have any friends who want to get organized, please spread the word!

Thanks for all your support, everyone!



Here's Part 2.  Seriously, could they capture a better facial expression in the still frame?

Our New Welcome Video for The Power of Moms

I STILL haven't unpacked from our Power of Moms Retreat, but this past week has been full of exciting developments with The Power of Moms, and although I am more tired now than I've ever been in my life, I'm also really optimistic about all that's in store.

Saren and her family came and stayed with us for the weekend, and we had tons of fun going to the beach, playing kickball at the park, and staying up late into the night planning the future of the website (9 children in my little house was quite a squeeze, but they all got along so well, and we were having so much fun that we didn't even notice the mess!).

Our husbands have made all this possible for us.  They've been helping us out every step of the way, and while we made the video below, they took care of the children and cleaned the kitchen...quite the memorable Father's Day, I'm sure.  (We did try to make it special for them with a nice breakfast, homemade cards, and some chocolate treats from Trader Joe's.)

So that's what's been going on here....  I'll blog more soon!

-April

Our June 2010 Power of Moms Retreat

My head is spinning after an amazing weekend at our Power of Moms Retreat.  I honestly don't know if it's possible to sum up everything I learned, felt, and experienced, but I at least want to post a few photos and share by biggest takeaways from this life-changing event.  I'm thoroughly sleep-deprived, but simultaneously ECSTATIC about the worldwide growth potential of this organization.  (I'm writing this as my two-year-old dances around me to a Barney cassette tape, so I can't guarantee complete coherence!)

We started out with some "Speed-Friendshipping" as our 30 participants arrived.  We switched parters every five minutes, and everyone received a little list of questions to help get to know one another in preparation for our discussion-rich classes.   

This was such a fun way to make fast friends.  I had a hard time holding back on the hugs.

Isn't it great to see moms relaxing and smiling together?

I think one of the best parts of a Retreat is not having to cook your own food.  Red Mountain Spa had some amazing gourmet food.  It was TOTALLY on the healthy side, so I'll admit I could have used a little more "comfort" food, but I lost a pound over the weekend, so that was a nice bonus.

I loved getting to see Saren, Shawni, and Linda together...they are incredible.  (During this photo shoot, Shawni was checking in on Lucy who was being babysat at Saren's house.)

Here's what our conference room looked like.  It had a nice, intimate feel, and we all took turns sharing our ideas, asking questions, etc.  LOVE these women.

Here's a photo of four of our five presenters: Me, Linda, Saren, and Allyson.  I feel incredibly privileged to know these women.

We played some games at night.  You know those crazy get-to-know-you games you played at camp when you were young?  Well, that's what we did.  I was giddy with excitement.  At one point, when we were all sitting in two rows, holding hands, playing "Lightning," I said, "Do you think there is another group of moms in the ENTIRE WORLD playing this game right now?  

It got a little dark, so it was kind of hard to see each other, and I think a few moms felt like we were holding them captive at the game night (sorry, ladies!), but overall, I think it bonded us together.  Here's half our group with Saren,

and here's the other half with me (sometimes we had to split up to make the games more manageable).  From left to right are Miken, Laura, Laurie, Tiffany, Lindsay, Aubrey, Mary, Me, Megan, Heather, Allyson, Erika, Amber, and Danielle.

Below is a photo I took of one of my favorite conversations this weekend.  These three darling girls are part of one of our Learning Circles in Arizona.  They told us how their group of 12 women gathers each month--having read the assigned article AND the suggested articles--and they stay on task, discuss how to improve as mothers, and provide an environment where they can all grow into the mothers and women they want to be.  I had to snap a photo because this means so much to us.  Learning Circles are 100% Saren's vision, and seeing them in action is beyond amazing.   If you haven't started one yet, we've got a summer special going on...sign up!

A few of us got up early in the morning and went walking on the Lava Loop trail.  St. George is absolutely gorgeous.  We all wish we could have stayed there a week so we could have enjoyed the outdoors a bit more.

Below is a photo of one of the best classes of the Retreat for me.  Saren, Shawni, and Linda (Eyre) taught us about Family Systems--how to help our children to behave, manage resources, and feel a strong family identity.  If you were to search the world for a team of women to teach on this topic, you would be hard-pressed to find anyone more qualified.  I've been a new mom in the 24 hours since I returned home (more on that later).

I need to do an entire post on what's going on with Mind Organization for Moms, as well.  I had the chance to teach the whole program to our group, and it turned out better than I imagined.  I can't wait to get this out to more moms across the world.

When the Retreat ended, I had the pleasure of hearing Mindy and Valerie sing a "Power of Moms Retreat" song Mindy wrote in honor of the event.  This great guitarrist was scheduled to play at the Red Mountain Spa restaurant that night, so he graciously accompanied them.  I'm in the process of uploading this to YouTube...I'll publish it as soon as I can!

As I was driving home with Allyson and Laurie, we were having such a great time discussing everything we learned that we didn't realize we were RUNNING OUT OF GAS!  Allyson literally coasted off the freeway, and we came to a stop 20 yards from a gas pump.  What are the odds?  As soon as we stopped the car, six men came running over and pushed us up to the pump.  Our heroes!

If you think you might like to attend our next Retreat (or one of the Retreats or Workshops put on by our new Power of Moms Trainers), please be sure to sign up for our newsletter.  It will be wonderful!  You'll return home feeling relaxed, motivated, and truly happy with your life.

Seeing Clearly

This morning I was working on a class for the Power of Moms Retreat coming up on June 11th.   Saren and I will be team-teaching a session called "Taking Care of the Person Inside the Mom," and we're dividing it up into spiritual, physical, and mental aspects of "personhood."

One quotation we are going to discuss is by Adlin Sinclair: "You are the embodiment of the information you choose to accept and act upon.  To change your circumstances you need to change your thinking and subsequent actions."

Sometimes changing our circumstances doesn't mean becoming more wealthy, more talented, more involved in the community, or more like all the people we admire (in the possessions we acquire, the clothes we wear, the causes we support, etc.).  Sometimes the best way to change our circumstances is to change the way we look at our lives and to finally begin to see things clearly.

Saren sent me an email tonight telling me that one of our Retreat attendees is looking to figure out how to "get it all done":  

"There is SO much that we as moms need to do right?  Right now, I am stressing over my three-month supply, mind organization for mothers, house cleaning, decluttering, exercise, cooking, the list could go on and on and on. I want to be a mom that can do it all. Sometimes I think that I should and could do it all.

"In my sane mind, I can see that doing it all is not possible all the time. Sure, I hope to come home with some better ideas on how to do some of the important things we need to accomplish. But today I had the thought that what I hope to get out of this retreat is that I am who I am, and I need to learn how to be happy with that. I love my children, I love being a mom, I love my husband, I have a good life, and I want to enjoy it. I don't want to be "trying" so hard all the time. 

"So the question on my mind is this... How can I learn to be content and enjoy my life?

"I'm not one that strives for mediocracy, or is happy just living.  I'm constantly pushing my limits, trying to do better, trying to learn how to be better, trying to be like this person or having what this mom has.  I truly do like setting goals, and trying to improve. But seriously, should life be full of pushing ourselves? Or is there a line and a balance of trying, but not trying so hard we end up being discouraged?"

This email struck such a chord with me because I have felt this way so many times.  I know that progression is essential to life, but it absolutely must be balanced with having joy.  My husband frequently reminds me of two scriptures that teach us to be anxiously engaged in a good cause without running faster than we have strength.  In fact, the whole reason I'm so excited about Mind Organization for Moms is because it is the first system that has actually allowed me to move forward with my goals without feeling stressed out.  But I'm still not a master at seeing my life clearly.

Back to that quotation by Sinclair, we ARE the embodiment of the information we choose to accept and act upon.  My mother taught this to me beautifully the other day.  I visited her at the hospital for a couple of hours while she was recovering from a knee replacement surgery, and she was asking me how I was doing (that's just like my mom...asking ME how I am while SHE'S in the hospital bed).  

I opened my heart to her and said, "Mom, I'm trying so hard, but I feel like I'm failing so often.  Like today...I had these great intentions of teaching my girls piano lessons and playing with the children after school, and then I felt so tired, I just collapsed on the couch and cat-napped while they played with the train set and took turns on the computer."

My mom looked me in the eye and said, "April, you don't really believe you're failing, do you?"

"Well, yes, sometimes I do."

And then she said those words that I was aching to hear, "You must not listen to that negative voice for one minute.  If you sit still, you'll hear another voice--a more powerful voice--telling you that you are doing a wonderful job."

She continued her pep talk for a couple more minutes, and I said, "Mom, I need a tape recorder of you telling me that."

To which she replied, "No, you don't need a tape recorder.  You KNOW this.  It's in your heart.  It's inside you from everything you have been taught.  It's everything that you are."

I couldn't stop the tears as I walked out to the hospital parking lot that evening.  She's right.  In spite of all the voices that are out there telling mothers that we're not doing enough or being enough, there is a quiet, more powerful, more accurate voice that helps us to see our lives clearly.  It helps us to know what we need to improve, but it isn't a harsh, critical voice.  It is one that sees us as who we really are and who we're meant to be, and it is THAT voice that I am going to accept and act upon.  It breaks my heart to think of so many moms (including myself) who get so confused by the whirlwind of life that they forget how needed they are, how important they are, and how irreplaceable they are...just the WAY they are.  I think it's time for all of us to start seeing things clearly.

Sweet Memories

The other day, I was helping my son pack for his first grade field trip to the tide pools.  We got his sack lunch together, and I asked, "Would it be okay if I wrote 'I love you' on the front of the bag?"

My son got a concerned look on his face and said, "No.  Everyone will laugh."

Then he brightened and said, "But you can write it on the inside!"

And there you have it: