Happy New Year's Eve!

I just wanted to take a moment to send my love to my family and friends (and any blog-readers who I haven't had a chance to meet yet).

Eric and I spent the day organizing boxes in the garage and the attic--while our children practiced barrel-walking, went bike-riding around the neighborhood, and threw water balloons at each other (it was so nice and warm).

I read once on GTD Times that it's less important to set New Year's resolutions, and more important to clear out the clutter in our lives to create space for new projects and opportunities.  So I've spent many hours this month turning spaces like this:

Into more organized spaces like this:

One of my posts, "How to De-Junk in a Whirlwind" is up on The Power of Moms right now, along with a recent podcast I recorded with a lovely mother named Tina Marantette.

The main thing that's on my mind, though, is my evaluation of 2011.  Simple Mom has 20 great reflective questions posted on her site this week, and it was fun to look through them and consider how our family and The Power of Moms has grown this year.

But the number one question I ask myself each year is, "Have I grown closer to Christ?" 

If I've grown closer to Christ . . .

• I've been kinder to my family
• I've strengthened my marriage
• I've used my time wisely
• I've gained a greater understanding of who I am
• I've served His children with more charity in my heart
• I've surrounded myself with people and things that uplift
• I've cherished the precious moments around me
• I've become less selfish, less obsessed with my flaws, and more willing to unite my will with God's
• I've been brave when I wanted to shrink
• I've gained a deeper understanding of my absolute dependence on my Creator, and 
• I've devoted myself to becoming even closer to Him in 2012.

I know I'm lacking in about 10,000 areas, and I know it's going to take a long time to get where I need to be, but as I close up 2011, I feel very grateful for the chance to live, the chance to be a wife and mother, and the chance to grow a little bit closer to the Lord each day.

Have a wonderful New Year!

Love,
April

Merry Christmas!

My children are out of school for three weeks, and although there is a lot of "life" going on (doctor appointments, the stomach flu, grocery shopping, laundry, home repairs, emails, activities, etc.), I'm doing everything I can to cherish the moments with my children and enjoy this beautiful Christmas season.

My children love buying and wrapping gifts for each other (they've been saving up their money . . . and we're keeping things simple), they join me each morning for scripture study and family exercise, and we spend each day running errands, cleaning, reading, napping (of course!), and doing all we can to make this season a little better for those in need.  In spite of some hectic moments, things have been wonderful.

This December is also when Eric and I get to celebrate our 13th anniversary.

I spent three hours making a movie with Alia last night, featuring 13 years of our most memorable family photos set to the music of our favorite family songs.  Alia has been scanning photos from our old albums for weeks, and last night after we put everything together, we snuggled on my bed and watched the 10-minute movie--while I tried to hold in the tears.  It was our special gift to Eric this Christmas--and a fun "family birthday" gift.  I'll post some photos from the movie once I have a bit more computer time.

Tonight Alia and Grace made a cake so we could sing "Happy Birthday" to the Perry Family.  They made a card, cleaned up the house, and practiced a little dance for us, too. 

It doesn't seem like it's been 13 years since I fell in love with Eric.  We've definitely had our share of ups and downs, but I can honestly say I'm married to my best friend.

This is a photo of us from about a month after we started dating:

I know that not everyone has a happy marriage, so I'm always hesitant to write too much about Eric, but I also want to be as clear as I can that we are two very imperfect individuals, and the only reason our marriage is so strong is because we work at it every single day--keeping Christ at the center of everything.

My children have discovered me (I snuck off into a little corner to type this), so I will go get them tucked in bed.  I just know I won't be writing on this blog for awhile, so I wanted to say Merry Christmas to my friends and family who read this blog and thank you for your powerful influence in my life.

I hope your Christmas is wonderful!

Love,
April



P.S. We also have a special Christmas gift, including TWO free programs, waiting for you at The Power of Moms (in case you haven't seen it yet!).

Click here to receive your gifts.  Enjoy!

Help for a Distracted Mother

I'm over at Deseret News today with a post called "Help for a Distracted Mother."

Hope you're having a wonderful day!

Love,
April

Candy Cane Airplanes

A couple of weeks ago, our family sat down together and planned our "perfect" Christmas.

One thing we love is making candy cane airplanes. It's a tradition from my dad that I cherished while I was growing up. We made them every year and hung them on our tree.

My dad is almost 80 years old, so this year, we decided we wanted to make candy cane airplanes with the master.

After my nephew's beautiful baptism last Saturday, I took my children to my parents' house for a mini-airplane assembly session.  I knew this would be a memorable time, but it turned out to be even more magical than I'd anticipated.

We gathered near the front window and set up our supplies.

My dad is one of the most patient people I have ever met.  He worked with the children to get the airplanes just right.  We spent about fifteen minutes threading rubber bands through the Lifesavers, adding in the sticks of gum for wings, and finally finishing off with the candy canes and hooks.

I think my dad is just so cute.

This is one of my favorite pictures.  My mom was singing "Silver Bells" for us, and everyone was so happy and quiet as they listened to the music, made their airplanes, and just enjoyed being together.

There's something beautiful and comforting about joining three generations in a simple Christmas tradition. Alia prepared step-by-step instructions on how to make candy cane airplanes (below).  I love Christmas.

Do you want to share any of your favorite traditions?

 

 

-----

Written by Alia: 

My family makes these airplanes every year.  My mom made them every year with her dad and this year, we went to their house and make them together.

To make them, you will need:

Candy canes

Lifesavers (minty)

Mint gum

Rubber bands

Ornament hooks (optional)

We finished our airplanes!!

First, unwrap the 2 Lifesavers and stick a rubber band through them.

Next, place a stick of gum through the rubber band that is inside the Lifesavers.

Finally, add the candy cane in the middle of the Lifesavers' rubber band. You can add an ornament hook as well.

This is a fun craft to start off the season!

 

Southern California Retreat Location?

Do you know the perfect Southern California location for a Power of Moms Retreat?

We're holding a Power of Moms Retreat January 28th, and we're still looking for just the right place.   If you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them!


What are Power of Moms Retreats?

Since June of 2010, The Power of Moms has held 10 Retreats around the country.  This page on our website describes the Retreats in greater detail, but our main goal is to gather mothers to a beautiful location and give them an opportunity to strengthen each other, participate in meaningful discussions, and return home armed with ideas and inspiration to help them build great families.

A Day Retreat typically lasts from 9 am to 5 pm on a Saturday, and it includes conference-style presentations (with lots of audience participation), a lovely lunch with powerful discussion groups, and several break-out sessions for small group conversations.

We focus on topics such as taking care of the person inside the mom, establishing family systems, moving good ideas forward, and keeping a healthy perspective on motherhood.  Each Retreat has been incredible.  Not because we think we're incredible, but because the mothers who attend are deliberate, sharp, wonderful women who want to create strong families.  Simply being in a room with so many good women who simply want to grow and learn from each other is powerful.

Here are the details on our location search:

• What are we looking for? While we are considering some beautiful hotels and event centers, we would love to find a large home that can seat between 60 and 90 mothers.  (We won't be bringing our children, so it will stay very clean!)  By holding the Retreat in a home, we are able to keep the costs down and enable more mothers to attend.  We are also able to provide more discounted rates for mothers who really want to attend but might not be struggling financially.  There is also something beautiful about being in a home atmosphere.
  

• Location: Southern California--within an hour of Disneyland (we won't be going to Disneyland, but that's the general area)

• Ideal amenities: Convenient parking, space for lunch discussion groups to be held outside, two restrooms, and the ability to bring in outside catering.

• Date and Time: The main Retreat will be Saturday, January 28th from 9 am to 5 pm, but we'll need to set up the night before, and then we'll stay to clean up, so it will probably be more like 8 am to 7 pm.  Also, we are planning to do a Friday "Mind Organization for Moms" session during the daytime (either from 9-12 or 1-4), but we can hold that at a separate, smaller location, if needed.

• What will The Power of Moms provide?  Chair rental (if needed), a catered lunch to be brought in, cleaning costs after the Retreat, plus all the set-up, logistics, etc.  Basically, if a homeowner is kind enough to co-sponsor this Retreat, we will take care of all the details and do our best to create as little disruption as possible.

Here are a couple of photos from our Retreats this year:

If you can think of a location that would be right for this event, would you please email april (at) powerofmoms.com and let me know about it?

Thank you so much!

Love,
April

My Stress-Free Christmas Planning Session

Sometimes Christmas feels like an all-consuming project that sends us racing through malls, jumping from party to party, and being busy-busy-busy as we fill our time with lots of Christmas fluff.
I want something more than that, though.

I don’t want to have to “recover” from Christmas. I don’t want to start the new year eight pounds heavier. I don’t want my children focused only on the electronic gadgets they hope Santa brings. But everything I don’t want will probably become my reality–unless I take the initiative to implement what I do want.

David Allen’s Natural Planning Model (from the book Getting Things Done) seriously saves my sanity on everything from birthday party planning to creating new programs for my website, so this year, I decided to use the five steps of the Natural Planning Model to create a Christmas experience that is both magical and meaningful.

Step One: Defining Purpose and Principles

For this part, I sat down with my children and gave them the following prompts:

• What’s the purpose of this season?
• What do you want this Christmas to feel like for our family?
• Please finish this sentence: “I would be happy with any Christmas celebration, as long as . . .”

Then I took good notes, and the beauty of their responses continues to amaze me.



Step Two: Outcome Visioning

We did this part on a separate day with an informal breakfast discussion, which basically took our ideas from Step One to a deeper level.

My 11-year-old was the scribe: We agreed that we want to be well-rested, reasonably-paced, and organized throughout the holiday, and we’re going to continue exercising and eating well so we’ll be in better health by the time the tree comes down.　

We’re all going to be happy with our Christmas gifts–even if we don’t get the “big” stuff that all the kids at school are talking about. We’ll purchase and wrap our presents by the first week of December, shop together for a beautiful tree that will be trimmed with homemade decorations, and focus the majority of our activities and expenses on making others happy.

Just typing these things out gets me so excited about the holiday season. Certainly, there will be days that won’t go as planned (probably most days), and some of us will be whiny or emotional while others will be frustrated or exhausted, but that’s just life. We can still aim high, can’t we?



On to Step Three: Brainstorming

This step is my favorite because it gives us a place to write all the ideas we’ve been cooking up over the past few months.　

We looked carefully at our notes from the first two steps and then gathered as a family one evening to brainstorm around seven areas of focus. Here they are:

• Activities and Outings
• Helping Others
• Uplifting Media
• Christmas Cards
• Gifts
• Meaningful Traditions
• Healthy Food

Then my daughter added an eighth area called, “Unhealthy food.” (She needed a place to include the gingerbread house.)

Photo courtesy of Shawni Pothier

Seeing our areas of focus as clusters on one page helps us to realize that the “all-consuming” holiday planning really is finite. We can create boundaries around our time, we can control our expenditures, and we can make sure our energy is spent on what’s most important.　

In many areas, there’s a clear overlap. Can’t we create meaningful traditions that help others? Can’t healthy Christmas goodies and beautiful music be part of our Christmas-gift giving? Looking at the big picture clarifies everything.

Step Four: Organizing

This part initially feels hard. How am I going to take all these brainstorms and make them manageable?

Simply jump in.

I wrote out all the components and sub-components on little slips of paper.



Then I moved them around and organized them according to priority and sequence.
Here are my three sub-clusters: things to do this week, things to do before December 1st, and things to do in early December.



I noticed that four of these slips contained two-minute tasks, so I quickly accomplished those and then moved onto the next step.

Step Five: Identifying Next Actions

As I was getting all my ideas out onto Post-it Notes, I realized that some things I wrote down were projects, while others were tasks.
　
I created a list of Current Christmas Projects,



and then I created two Next Actions Lists: one for immediate Next Actions–things to accomplish within the next week, and one for important Next Actions–things to accomplish as soon as it’s convenient.



Then I simply put these sheets into my inbox to organize during my next Weekly Review.
I’ll create calendar triggers for the Christmas plans that mean the most to me, and then I’ll just do my best with the rest, knowing that ultimately, spontaneous events might replace those I’ve planned, some of these projects might not seem as important three weeks from now, and what really matters is how this holiday feels.

Your family’s Christmas planning will likely be much different than ours. There’s no one “right” way to do this, but I hope that this exercise using the Natural Planning Model will help you to create a wonderful Christmas for you and the ones you love.

To download your own template like the one in the photos, click here!

My Top Three Home Improvement Projects

I was looking through my files of current projects the other day, and I came across a folder labeled, "Home Improvement."

Of course, when we think of home improvement, we generally think of things like refinishing the kitchen cabinets, adding new blinds to the bedroom windows, or building a cover over the back patio.

We do have several projects like that waiting in the wings, but there are some more important home improvement projects that I want to accomplish as soon as possible.

(1) I want to speak to my children respectfully--100% of the time. 

I've noticed that sometimes my voice sounds pretty frustrated.  Sometimes it's because my children are a challenge, but other times it's simply because I'm focused on other worries, and the noise of my family feels like too much.

When I was growing up, my parents never treated me as an annoyance.  They were so loving and patient with me, and I never went to bed wondering where I stood with them.

Many times, I would walk into my mom's room and find her kneeling at the side of her bed in prayer.  She would immediately stop, look up at me, and hold out her arms so I would come give her a hug and tell her what I needed.

One day I asked, "Mom, what do you tell God when I interrupt your prayer?"

She replied, "I just say that my child needs me, and I'll be right back."

My parents didn't take us to Europe or buy us cars when we turned 16.  We didn't have a pool or a game room.  And we didn't have a cabin in the mountains or memberships to country clubs.

But none of that mattered.  We knew we mattered.

(2) I want to reciprocate the love my children show to me.

Alia and Grace "heart attacked" the office the other night (when I thought they were in bed).  They stuck notes on the window,

sprinkled cut-out hearts all over the desk,

 

and created all kinds of pictures and designs for Eric and I to enjoy.

The following morning at 6:30, I was working on my laptop in my bedroom when they came in and asked excitedly, "Did you SEE it?"

"See what?"

"The OFFICE!"

"Oh no, I haven't been in there yet.  I'm just working on a couple of things before I come down to breakfast.  I'll check it in a minute."

I should have jumped right up and ran into the office.  But I just wanted to finish "one more thing" (I can't even remember what it was now).


They waited by me patiently, and then we did go into the office together, and I "oohed" and "ahhed" over all the darling love notes they wrote, but looking back on it now, my gratitude didn't match the gift.  Alia even told me she'd had a dream that I walked into the office, saw their handiwork, and got SO excited.

I'm going to go "heart attack" them back as soon as I finish this post.  (Fortunately, I'm realizing where I'm lacking before my children grow up and leave the house.)

Grace also brought me breakfast twice in the past week.

 
Both times she forgot to make breakfast for herself because she was so excited to serve me--and then later those mornings, she wondered why she was so hungry.

I haven't made her breakfast in bed for months.  That's going to change.

My children are so thoughtful.  I don't want to overlook their kindnesses and regret the way I spent my time.

So that's Home Improvement Project #2.

(3) I want to laugh more.


Some moms are so good at relaxing and having fun with their families.  On a scale of 1-10, 10 being best, I think I'm a 5.

Home Improvement Project #3 is to become a 9+.

It doesn't take that much, really, to smile and laugh during our meals or bedtime.  If I spelled out all the things I'm worried about right now, I bet you'd tell me that I have every right to be serious and/or worried instead of light and happy.

But I keep thinking about the words to one of my new favorite songs, "Little Wonders."

Our lives are made in these small hours, 
These little wonders, these twists & turns of fate.  
Time falls away, but these small hours, these small hours still remain. 
Our lives are made in these small hours.

I also think of this image a friend shared on Facebook recently:

 

I love this, but I don't want to just "hold it together."  I want to soar.  I want our family to genuinely feel the power that's available to us.

I want my children to think their home is the safest, happiest, most wonderful place to be.  Not because the house is incredibly large or gorgeous, but because they know the people who live here are absolutely crazy about them.

It's not a simple job.  But it's my job.  And that's the most important way that I'm going to improve my home.

What do YOU do to improve your homes?