Saturday, April 9, 2011

Creating Gentlemen

When I was dating in high school and college, I came to the realization that not every young man knows how to be a gentleman (some do, of course, and I really appreciated that, but many do not).

Fortunately, my dad showed me how a gentleman behaves.  He would walk on the "street-side" of the sidewalk, open doors for my mom and his girls, speak kindly and calmly, and show respect for others. 

My husband is the same way, and I tell you, it makes all the difference in the world.

Now I have two sons who need to learn these kinds of skills, and I'm realizing that gentlemen don't spontaneously appear.  They have to be carefully educated.

So here's a video showing how we're working with three-year-old Spencer:

 


This little guy melts my heart.  He sat there staring through the doors for a couple of minutes, hoping someone would come out and appreciate his door-opening services.  I'm thrilled with his love for helping people, but now I need more ideas.  What kinds of things can I do to help my sons become gentlemen?  Please, please share!

8 comments:

  1. I'm trying to get my boys not to belch (esp. at the table)...

    I'm also working on having them treat their sister as if she were one of their friends (since they both have close friends that are girls). They're learning ladies first and that they should open the door for her before we get in the van and shut it when everyone is in.

    They escort me to the dinner table arm in arm every night. (Or "squirt" me as Dan the 5 year old says.)

    And, I'll have to think of more... but the stream of consciousness has ended!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I LOVE that your boys escort you to the table, Megan! How sweet. Do they just bring you to the table from the kitchen? Ours is about 3 inches away, but I like the idea :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I do the same. My boys are grown, but there are things they just had to learn not to do. They always had to wear shirts to eat at the table. Most of the time, they had to wear shirts anyway. They opened the doors of the car for their sisters, you also have to teach the girls to wait for the door to be opened. They have to speak politely, again, dinner time is perfect for this. No belching or yelling, or any other inappropriate behavior. One of the boys took his sister to a school prom. she was in charge of the decorations, but not yet 16, so her brother took her to the dance. He even got a tux for it and bought her a flower and they had a wonderful time. It is one of their favorite memories and my daughter still says it is the best dance she ever went to!

    ReplyDelete
  4. April, this season I followed my family up to the ski slopes with our toddler for the day. She and I couldn't ski but we rode the gondola all day. We had to wait for a very long ride back to the parking lot on a bus to meet up with the rest of the fam and in her exhaustion, she had fallen asleep on my shoulder. We stepped on to the very crowded bus with standing room only and tried to hang on without falling over.

    An older gentleman got up and game me his seat and I couldn't help but think, chivalry is not dead! And my boys better always do that for any lady. These teachings seem to be getting lost in our times.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love these stories! I think if the moms of the world all get on the same page, we could help bring back chivalry :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. I do the same. My boys are grown, but there are things they just had to learn not to do. They always had to wear shirts to eat at the table. Most of the time, they had to wear shirts anyway. They opened the doors of the car for their sisters, you also have to teach the girls to wait for the door to be opened. They have to speak politely, again, dinner time is perfect for this. No belching or yelling, or any other inappropriate behavior. One of the boys took his sister to a school prom. she was in charge of the decorations, but not yet 16, so her brother took her to the dance. He even got a tux for it and bought her a flower and they had a wonderful time. It is one of their favorite memories and my daughter still says it is the best dance she ever went to!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm trying to get my boys not to belch (esp. at the table)...

    I'm also working on having them treat their sister as if she were one of their friends (since they both have close friends that are girls). They're learning ladies first and that they should open the door for her before we get in the van and shut it when everyone is in.

    They escort me to the dinner table arm in arm every night. (Or "squirt" me as Dan the 5 year old says.)

    And, I'll have to think of more... but the stream of consciousness has ended!

    ReplyDelete



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